My Issue With Success
Am I successful? I guess it depends…
A few days ago an old friend, who I seem to have lost contact with, texted me congratulating me on my achievements. In his words "a PhD, a book deal, working with the parliament. You are definitely not the same person". Eheh, that last bit I believe was a reference to the student I was back in high school (a very average one, at best).
That message got me thinking: am I successful? The obvious answer for me was: no! Everyone can do a PhD, write a book and, obviously, every decent liar and con artist can work with the parliament.
So what do I need to accomplish to feel successful?
Wealth? Having 'FU Money' seems to be an agreed-upon metric. To be fair, I agree with metric but only to a certain point. Why do you need more than a few million quid in Europe? Healthcare is free, travel is affordable. A few million quid invested accounts for inflation and can pay a decent dividend.
A good job title? Postdoctoral researcher does not sound quite as good as Assistant Professor. Assistant Professor does not sound as good as Associate Professor. Associate Professor does not sound as good as a Full Professor. Full Professor does not sound as good as Chair... well, you get the gist of it. If we keep chasing titles we will only feel successful when we are older.
Recognition. Being famous. Having people recognise you and your work is another agreed-upon metric. I am conflicted on this one. Not everyone wants to be famous. Many people are comfortable being who they are only for a select number of people and that is completely ok.
To me, ends up being so much more than these past variables.
Family & love. Being able to spend quality time with loved ones. Seeing them grow (old), travel with them, enjoy the small moments, laughs, intimacy... that matters, if not the much. In other words, work-life balance matters.
Do whatever you love. Yes, ideally you would get paid to do what you love. However, most people cannot afford that luxury. Fortunately, I do what I like to do. There are other things, though, that I love doing outside my work sphere. Photography, travelling, aviation, writing, reading. Affording the time to practice these hobbies I love is a measure of success.
Impact. Having a positive impact on society. Being able to change and promote change is a very important metric of success. Teaching and mentoring are by far the most fulfilling part of my job as an academic. Seeing students grow, learn, and mature is priceless.
Happiness. Everything I just described ends up measuring not only my success but also my happiness. I am truly happy when all those things are in harmony. Am I happy all the time? No! Such is life. Work may end up taking a bit more time off my days, or a beloved pet may die while you spend too much time far away making you reevaluate your life and priorities. Such is life!
For me, it all comes down to time. Having the power over what I do with my time. Distributing it fairly by the things that I love doing, the things that pay me money (hopefully they end up overlapping with the things I love doing), and family & love.
